i believe in a God of miracles
i believe in a God who makes the blind see
i believe in a God who makes the lame walk
i believe in a God who restores broken lives
i believe in a God who rose again
i believe in a God who promises not to forsake me
i believe in a God who has never once said a bad thing about me
i believe in a God who died for me
i believe in a God who defends me
i believe in a God who is the GOD of all gods.
i believe in a God who loves me.
i believe in a God who knows how i feel
i believe in a God who will never leave me.
Reassurance is key.
Temptations to not believe are bold.
Faith is believing without seeing so i will to close my eyes to the hurt and jump into His truth
Monday, April 30, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
You Could Say So
I'm under the water and it's all a blur.
i stop.
i think.
I'm under the water yet it's all so dirty.
My hurts, my fears, my complaints, my desires.
It's all there right in front of me.
Sometimes i forget it.
Grace, that is.
I forget that there is a plan i dont know about; i misplace my map and start to panic.
I'm under the water and its all so clear.
i stop.
i think.
i smile.
i stop.
i think.
I'm under the water yet it's all so dirty.
My hurts, my fears, my complaints, my desires.
It's all there right in front of me.
Sometimes i forget it.
Grace, that is.
I forget that there is a plan i dont know about; i misplace my map and start to panic.
I'm under the water and its all so clear.
i stop.
i think.
i smile.
Thursday, April 26, 2012
To my Mister
my phone vibrates and i don't even look at it. i know its not you so why bother? i continue on with my day and nothing really is that different. Its not that im sad im actually really happy. Life is good. friends are marvelous and my family is close. i go to school to sit and learn, lunch and break are my favorite parts. I smile, i laugh. I cry and i hurt. Its not that im sad, im actually really happy. I go to work and love it. I get splashed and giggle. I call my students by whichever superhero they are that day and i smile till i clock out. I drive home and end up in a haze. Its not that im sad, im actually really happy. i go on dates and get the butterflies. I sit in church and learn such great lessons. I play ball with my boys and shop with the girls. but at the end of the day as i try to slip into wonderland there is a piece of me sneaking out of the door into the dark cover of the night. Its not that im sad, im actually really happy. That part of me flows to the outside and the search is on.
they're looking for you.
I have a list of my wants and plans but it leaves that behind and is finding you.
You will love me and you will care.
You'll listen when i talk but shut me up when it's right.
You'll come shopping with me and never say i look fat.
You'll take me to dinner and refuse not to pay.
You'll act like you know which curtain looks better
&
You'll vote on what shoes i purchase.
I dont know what you look like, your age or your eyes but i do know this.
Right now your phone vibrates and you don't look at it. You know its not me so why bother? you continue on with your day and nothing really is that different. Its not that your sad, youre actually really happy. Life is good. friends are supportive and your family tight knit. youre in school zoning out in class, lunch and break zoom by. you smile, you laugh. You cry and you hurt. Its not that youre sad, youre actually really happy. you go to work and love it.You drive home and your music is too loud. Its not that yorue sad, yorue actually really happy. You go on dates and get the butterflies. You pull out their chairs and listen to their stories. You sit in church and learn such great lessons. You play ball with your boys and consul your girl friends but at the end of the day as you try to slip into your dreams there is a piece of you lingering outside in the dark obis. Its not that youre sad, your actually really happy. But that part of you flows to the outside and the search is on.
Youre looking for me & where i am.
Youre not quite sure where i am or who i am.
But let me reassure you, i will love you.
I'll go to games & cheer by your side
I'll pretend to know about cars and care about guns.
I'll help you find clothes that match and fall in love with your cologne.
Its not that life without you is sad, its just not what it could be.
they're looking for you.
I have a list of my wants and plans but it leaves that behind and is finding you.
You will love me and you will care.
You'll listen when i talk but shut me up when it's right.
You'll come shopping with me and never say i look fat.
You'll take me to dinner and refuse not to pay.
You'll act like you know which curtain looks better
&
You'll vote on what shoes i purchase.
I dont know what you look like, your age or your eyes but i do know this.
Right now your phone vibrates and you don't look at it. You know its not me so why bother? you continue on with your day and nothing really is that different. Its not that your sad, youre actually really happy. Life is good. friends are supportive and your family tight knit. youre in school zoning out in class, lunch and break zoom by. you smile, you laugh. You cry and you hurt. Its not that youre sad, youre actually really happy. you go to work and love it.You drive home and your music is too loud. Its not that yorue sad, yorue actually really happy. You go on dates and get the butterflies. You pull out their chairs and listen to their stories. You sit in church and learn such great lessons. You play ball with your boys and consul your girl friends but at the end of the day as you try to slip into your dreams there is a piece of you lingering outside in the dark obis. Its not that youre sad, your actually really happy. But that part of you flows to the outside and the search is on.
Youre looking for me & where i am.
Youre not quite sure where i am or who i am.
But let me reassure you, i will love you.
I'll go to games & cheer by your side
I'll pretend to know about cars and care about guns.
I'll help you find clothes that match and fall in love with your cologne.
Its not that life without you is sad, its just not what it could be.
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Memories
And here are some of the best.
 |
| Betsy Birthday |
 |
| Halloween <3 |
 |
| Mary's party! |
 |
| Football |
 |
| Winterball |
 |
| Taylor Swift |
 |
| No Pants Thursday |
 |
| Penn. |
 |
| Palm Springs |
 |
| Happy birthday Kaitlyn! |
 |
| Panoramic |
 |
| MORP |
Saturday, April 21, 2012
LBC is for me
He walked in holding her hand and her bag. She was in bright summer colors and her towel matched her adorable dress. She kicked off her flip-flops and got ready to get in the pool. He walked in like so many other parents do to my work. He walked in and sat down to watch Little Miss Sunshine for 30 min. He walked in and i knew something was different.
As time passed we began to talk. He asked me if i was enjoying my Saturday and we engaged in a life changing conversation. I was still in my suit: hair up in a bun and smelled like "pool". He asked what grade i was in and if i knew where i was going college.
"Yeah, i am a senior- less than 30 school days left, not that im counting. And im going to Lancaster Bible in the fall".
He asked if i was a Christian and i answered yes.
"Thats awesome. So are we! what's your planned major?"
i quickly replied, "Social Work" with a smile.
20 minuets later he had told me that his daughter really was his granddaughter and that he and his wife had adopted her from the beginning of her life. He told me about her mom. A drug addict; a women not fit to be a parent. He told me about her dad. She has never seen him. I got the goose bumps.
As i sat there in Indian style listening attentively i realized- im not scared.
I'm not scared about the future and really, im thrilled.
That little swimmer, she's why i am packing my bags and moving 3 hours ahead. She's why im not worried about my pay. She's why im excited about hurt. She is who i want to represent.
I understand that being a social worker is not Butterflies and Rainbows- i do.
But what i also understand is that there are so many kids out there who deserve to be loved. They deserve to be happy, to go to swim lessons, Disneyland and to the park.
He walked in and i saw the passion God has put in my heart.
As time passed we began to talk. He asked me if i was enjoying my Saturday and we engaged in a life changing conversation. I was still in my suit: hair up in a bun and smelled like "pool". He asked what grade i was in and if i knew where i was going college.
"Yeah, i am a senior- less than 30 school days left, not that im counting. And im going to Lancaster Bible in the fall".
He asked if i was a Christian and i answered yes.
"Thats awesome. So are we! what's your planned major?"
i quickly replied, "Social Work" with a smile.
20 minuets later he had told me that his daughter really was his granddaughter and that he and his wife had adopted her from the beginning of her life. He told me about her mom. A drug addict; a women not fit to be a parent. He told me about her dad. She has never seen him. I got the goose bumps.
As i sat there in Indian style listening attentively i realized- im not scared.
I'm not scared about the future and really, im thrilled.
That little swimmer, she's why i am packing my bags and moving 3 hours ahead. She's why im not worried about my pay. She's why im excited about hurt. She is who i want to represent.
I understand that being a social worker is not Butterflies and Rainbows- i do.
But what i also understand is that there are so many kids out there who deserve to be loved. They deserve to be happy, to go to swim lessons, Disneyland and to the park.
He walked in and i saw the passion God has put in my heart.
Sunday, April 15, 2012
That women
Today my heart was broken.
Today my life was changed.
Today my tears were shed.
I close my eyes and i see her.
I see her with her clay pot walking on the hot sand going to get water.
I see her ashamed and broken, but good at playing her part.
She gets to the side of the well and begins to draw water.
I see Him walk up behind her and i see His heart break for her. I see his future death and how it was for her.
I see her and i see me.
John 4 : 8-15
There is no other answer than the the cliche answer we've all known since kindergarten "Jesus"
Now, no i am not a Samaritan and no i don't have to go to a well but what i do have in common with her is my sin.
I in no way deserve to be loved. I am horrible; just as soon as i am done struggling with a sin and the spirit helps me leave it behind, BOOM another hindrance in my life.
It happens everyday.
But what i dont want you to miss from this story is who the women at the well was.
She was not just a women. She was entangled in webs of lies and unfaithful ways.
She is me.
And what did Christ do?
He came to her.
He came to me.
He showed her His love just as He showed me His love.
"Love came down and rescued me, love came down and set me free; i am Yours, i am forever Yours."
This is just food for thought.
Christ really broke me today.
Christ blinded me with His love and i just hope y'all get the same out of this i did.
God is good.
Today my life was changed.
Today my tears were shed.
I close my eyes and i see her.
I see her with her clay pot walking on the hot sand going to get water.
I see her ashamed and broken, but good at playing her part.
She gets to the side of the well and begins to draw water.
I see Him walk up behind her and i see His heart break for her. I see his future death and how it was for her.
I see her and i see me.
John 4 : 8-15
A woman, a Samaritan, came to draw water. Jesus said, "Would you give me a drink of water?"
9The Samaritan woman, taken aback, asked, "How come you, a Jew, are asking me, a Samaritan woman, for a drink?" (Jews in those days wouldn't be caught dead talking to Samaritans.)
10Jesus answered, "If you knew the generosity of God and who I am, you would be asking me for a drink, and I would give you fresh, living water."
11-12The woman said, "Sir, you don't even have a bucket to draw with, and this well is deep. So how are you going to get this 'living water'? Are you a better man than our ancestor Jacob, who dug this well and drank from it, he and his sons and livestock, and passed it down to us?"
13-14Jesus said, "Everyone who drinks this water will get thirsty again and again. Anyone who drinks the water I give will never thirst—not ever. The water I give will be an artesian spring within, gushing fountains of endless life."
15The woman said, "Sir, give me this water so I won't ever get thirsty, won't ever have to come back to this well again!"
I see confusion on her face, how could water give her endless life? and at that, why would a Jew be reaching out to a Samaritan? Why, why, why?
Now, no i am not a Samaritan and no i don't have to go to a well but what i do have in common with her is my sin.
I in no way deserve to be loved. I am horrible; just as soon as i am done struggling with a sin and the spirit helps me leave it behind, BOOM another hindrance in my life.
It happens everyday.
But what i dont want you to miss from this story is who the women at the well was.
She was not just a women. She was entangled in webs of lies and unfaithful ways.
She is me.
And what did Christ do?
He came to her.
He came to me.
He showed her His love just as He showed me His love.
"Love came down and rescued me, love came down and set me free; i am Yours, i am forever Yours."
This is just food for thought.
Christ really broke me today.
Christ blinded me with His love and i just hope y'all get the same out of this i did.
God is good.
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