one hundered and one.

It's been 101 days since i moved.
101 days of Pennsylvania.
101 days away from home.
It has been completely different than what i thought it would be. As i stepped onto that plane with my mom i never could have expected what would take place this semester.
No, this is not going to be a typical "look how far i have come" thing. That is not really how i do things. What this is is a testament to how far CHRIST has brought me.
Packing up my life and moving out here was no easy task, i be the first to admit that. However, i know that the only thing that kept me from going insane and losing it (more than a typical girl does) was my relationship with God.
I am not worthy of this. At all.
I don't understand how time and time again i can fail Him and He continues to let me come back to His arms.
I am not worthy at all.
And that is what is so amazing.
These last 101 days have been tough. At the same time, they have been really great. God has been showing me who i need to be THROUGH Him, not just alone. Nothing i do is because of who i am, it is all because of Him.
When i first moved here i didn't have anyone. Yes, i had been texting my roommate over the summer but i didn't know her, know her. I had no one. And as hard as that was, and sometimes is...i would never take back this semester. I have been forced to be completely dependent on Christ for everything. Do you know how scary that is? In all honesty, think about your comfortable christian life. Do you surrender everything to Him? Do you commit everything you do to Him? I am going to assume that you do not. I know that i don't. Once i got comfortable here i stopped. I was lukewarm and okay with that.

101 times i woke up in this room. Pictures of old and new friends plastered to all the walls. The fears and alienation had drifted away by around day 20. I was comfortable and going day to day.
Well thank God that He has sweet reminders. These can look like your loved ones being hospitalized. It can look like missing your baby sisters freshman year and ALL that that entails. It can look like the guy you had feelings for hurting you. It can look like stress on a friendship, God can make it look like anything. But as the days go on, and the trials pass i get a glimpse of what He is doing. Whenever i get comfortable, He comes alongside me and says, "Do you forget who i am?". If we are being honest, i do. I forget all the time. I get so caught up in the details.
My hero always tells me, "Enjoy the journey, not just the destination".
101 days of my journey are over. I can say with confidence that i have enjoyed some days more than others, but that overall this semester has taught me to remember who is fighting for me.

101 days ago i was not the girl i am today.
101 days have built my relationship with the Lord more than i could have ever imagined.