I just want to scream!
Take me back to when my dreams to help the helpless had no bounds. Take me to where World Civ 1 didn't stand in my way.
I've made a life of treading water. Summer days & winter mornings flash back & my legs are ready to surrender. My own weight is pulling me under and I'm ready to sink.
In and out, around again.
Egg beating till I'm safe.
Come summer time & it's my job to support another life.
In and out, around again.
In and out, around again.
Muscle tears, and then it builds.
It hurts.
Progress.
I get my pink Expo & select my classes. Papers cover my counter and I'm preparing my semester.
I'm drowning in credits. But this is treading, is it not?
This is mandatory. Without this, I can't help.
I can't support another life. I can't be who I want without these 3x a week classes. I can't start my dream till I finish this momentary nightmare (to be quite dramatic)
I just want to scream!
Back in the water is where I am happy. Coaching my little bugs overwhelmed my heart. Watching them progress, watching them learn. Priceless.
First we blow bubbles. Then put goggles on & we look at each other underwater. Now it's time for arms. "KICK, KICK, KICK, KICK". From the step to me. I take a step back. And another step. Soon my littles are swimming clear across the pool. But they wouldn't be here without bubbles. They wouldn't be here without the basics.
"I want to be the next Michael Phelps " - the words of one of my students.
Aspirations.
I sit again my dorm room wall. Next semester all planned out.
Overwhelmed and frustrated.
But, This is just bubble blowing, is it not?
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